I bet you all thought I got lost didn’t you?!  Well, when I say “all”, I guess I mean Skippy, since I think she’s the only one who actually knows about this blog and I’m pretty certain she’s forgotten about it… and let’s face it who can blame her since I seem to forget about it myself!?!

So, update…

The Burglary

The insurance claim for the burglary has finally been settled, cash is in my bank, products have been replaced and it’s almost as though it never happened.  I had to get a bit shirty with the insurers since they were dragging their heels and no sooner was someone assigned to my case than they went on holiday or were taken back off the case again.  Very frustrating.

The New Car

She’s lush (or is it a he?  I’ve not decided yet).  So much nicer to drive than my old corsa but then it should be considering it’s 11 years younger and is a 1.8 as opposed to a 1litre engine!  Again, nothing is straighforward though.  Firstly the in-car charger didn’t work (what would have been the cigarette lighter), which wouldn’ thave been a major drama except that I was away for the weekend and relying on my TomTom to tell me how to get everywhere!!  Then I discovered they hadn’t put the manuals and the service history book in the car.  I’ve managed to fix the charger however I’m still waiting for them to get the manuals and service history to me.  Ho hum

The Job

I’m back to really hating my job.  There’s only so much nothing a person can take.  The highlight of the last 6 months has been helping to tidy up the office over the last week and doing lots (and lots) of paper shredding… it was like one of those movie scenes where a corrupt financial institution has just been found out and all employees are told to “destroy everything!!!!”… or in fact probably like any day in any financial institution in the world, thieving b!”*&^ds.  I’m putting my CV out there as much as I possibly can but there just isn’t much out there.

I found the advert for my current role the other day and it’s laughable.  I wonder if it’s possible to sue for miss-selling under the trade descriptions act?!  Hmmmmm interesting.

 

So that’s all the updates.  In other news, I desperately want a dog.  I’m looking to move house in September/October (hopefully in conjunction with a job move!!) and one of the criteria will be the landlord allows dogs.  I’m not a fan of leaving dogs on their own all day but I’m hoping that I’ll live close enough to work that I can go home at lunch and failing that I’ll hire a dog walker to go in during the day.  Plus, I’ll be moving in with Ross so he’s usually at home one day from Monday – Friday so it’d only actually be 4 days the pooch would be on their own.  There’s actually already a pooch I have my eye on… a lurcher at the Blue Cross up in Leeds.  They reckon he’s a lazy boy and would be happy curled up on his bed all day 🙂

The other major issue would be Tess, my parent’s beautiful Blue Merle Collie.  She was also a rescue dog and has some behavioural issues… mainly in the form that she hates all other dogs!  But I’m hopeful that she’d get used to a new pooch being around… or would at least come to tolerate him/her.

I’m off on holiday in just over a week… CANNOT wait!!!

Something and Nothing…

Hmmmm so quite a while since my last post… not exactly what I had in mind when I started this blog!

So, the news since last time… something and nothing.

I was burgled.  That was fun.

Coming home after an evening away in Cardiff to find all my electronic valuables gone and my back window destroyed… not the best thing with a steaming hangover and after I’d spent the entire journey home day dreaming about getting in to my PJs and getting back into bed!  The police were great and arrived at my house within 15 minutes (ish)… the joys of living in a small community I guess. My landlord was useless, no offer of assistance to sort out changing locks or getting the house secure… as if I didn’t have enough to worry about and deal with.  I really do despair of landlords, I can’t wait to own my own place.

The really sad thing about the whole thing for me was that this is the first time I’ve lived in the countryside, the first time I’ve not been living in a city, yet this is the first time I’ve been burgled.  To this day I’m still not sure what conclusion to draw from that.  Have I just been unlucky on this occasion, or lucky for all the years living in cities?  Or is this just how it is?  Are you less safe living in a village than in a city?

If I’m honest I try not to think about it.  I love living in the countryside and I would hate to feel unsafe living somewhere I love.  I’m definitely developing my ability to compartmentalise things that I don’t want to think about too closely.

And in other news… I’m feeling more contented.  This isn’t to say that I’m happy with everything, just that I’m feeling less stressed about everything.  No my job isn’t great, yes my career seems to have flagged, no I don’t own my own place, no I don’t live near anyone I know but you know what?  At least I HAVE a job and I’m being paid well.  It’s summer and the sun is shining (for now!) and I’m quite happy to pootle along for a little while without having to worry about anything.

Oh and I got a new car on Friday… vroom vroom! 🙂

A new start, old ghosts

Another search for another new start…

I’ve had so many new starts in my life that I’m starting to wonder if the problem isn’t to do with needing a new start but with needing a new ending!

So anyway, since I’m new here, here’s a bit of background about me…

I’m single, in my 30s, work in IT and I’ve moved around… a LOT!  I’m currently 6 months into my 10th relocation.  Amongst various places in the UK I’ve also had the opportunity to live abroad; Bangkok and Sydney to be specific. Despite all this I’m dissatisfied with my life.  I’m not happy, not even close.  I couldn’t even describe myself as mildly contented.  I know in comparison with other people I’m living the dream and I should be counting my blessings, but I guess it depends on what your dream is doesn’t it?

As you can see, I really do mean it when I’ve had plenty of opportunity for a new start.  However, my experience tells me that your ghosts follow you.  The only place happiness is to be found is within yourself, and that’s what I’m looking for.  Sounds very clichéd but it makes it no less true.

It’s 11/1/11 today, 11 days late for new year resolutions but I’m not going to let that stop me.  I’m going to keep the concept pretty simple this year… find what it is that makes me happy.  Simple enough concept, difficult to put into practice.  So here are the current ideas:

1.  Lose weight… yes I know this is everyone’s new year resolution but I’ve already lost over a stone and I want to lose another 5 stone… and I want it gone by the end of the year.  By this I hope to gain confidence and energy.

2.  Get exercise to become part of my daily routine.  I’m not one for routines… except for the one involving getting up late and lazing around on my sofa!  But this change would definitely help resolution #1 and would equally help me gain self confidence and energy.  My problem is finding some kind of exercise that I really enjoy and that I WANT to go to rather than it feeling like a chore.  I began swimming lessons last year and I’ve really loved them, which is surprising considering I could hardly swim and water/swimming usually just sent me into a panic attack.  However, they haven’t had enough people sign up this term so the lessons have been cancelled.  I’m gutted.  So now I’m going to have to go swimming under my own steam… and I’m rubbish at doing things under my own steam, hence the lack of exercise in the first place!!  I’d also like to take up Zumba.  I know it’s all the rage at the moment but I’ve heard fantastic things about it plus I love dancing so maybe it’s an exercise class I could really enjoy?

3.  This is more of a vague resolution.  The first two are my most important ones this year, but I need to figure out what I’m doing in my career.  I feel I’m in a never ending cycle of misery with it.  I’d love to get out of IT, I don’t think I’m suited for it but it’s difficult to give up the good salary, especially whilst I’m single. As a result of moving around so much it feels like all I have in my life is my job, which, ironically, is probably one of the reasons it makes me miserable.  But I want something I can be passionate about, really love.  There’s nothing like that in my life.  I’m not passionate about anything or anyone in my life (I’m talking about a partner here rather than any of my wonderful friends).

Also as a result of having moved around so much I find myself in the situation that I only have a small set of friends and they’re located all around the world.  I know the saying goes that you can count the number of true friends on one hand, and I absolutely agree, however it would be nice to have a circle of local friends to go to the pub with, shopping with, chat with, laugh with etc etc etc.  I don’t find making casual friends easy.  I’m one of those people who prefers to be counted as a “true friend” than a “casual friend”, however I realise casual friends are important too, it’s just that I find developing that kinda friendship difficult.  In my most recent relocation I’ve moved somewhere that I know no-one, so getting off the mark in the friendship stakes is difficult.  I only work with 5 other people, all of whom are guys, and I’ve been trying to meet people outside of work but not very successfully.  I’ve been here 6 months now and I haven’t really made any friends… perhaps it’s me?

Anyway, I’ve rambled on long enough for my first post.  Hopefully my subsequent posts will be a bit more focused!  Sometimes it’s good to get this stuff off your chest though.

 

Thanks for listening

XXX